Monday, September 06, 2004
it's a little bit funny, this feeling inside
im not one of those who can easily hide
i dn't have much money but boy if i did
i'd buy a big house where we both could live
if i was a sculptor.... but then again, no.
or a man who makes potions in a travelling show
i know it's not much but it's the best i can do

my gift is my song and this one's for you
and you can tell everybody this is your song
it may be quite simple but now that it's done i hope you dn't mind
i hope you dn't mind that I put down in words
how wonderful life is, when you're in the world. (:

i sat on the roof and kicked off the moss
well a few of the verses... well, they've got me quite cross
but the sun's been quite kind while i wrote this song
it's for people like you that keep it turned on
so excuse me forgetting but these things I do
you see i've forgotten if they're green or they're blue
anyway the thing is what i really mean
your eyes, are the sweetest, i've ever seen.



| Washed at at Monday, September 06, 2004

Saturday, September 04, 2004
ah, what a day. (:
it all went great.
firstly, the match.
woke up ard 8plus, feeling damn lethargic.
oh no, NOT good i told myself.
cooked pasta/salad/potatoes and baked beans.
showered and went over to javiee's for a little while.
tht fattie who was supposed to be studying ended up playing spiderman with me on his xbox.

okay okay, THEN, the match.
erm
i was a little sluggish i must say. from warm up and stuff, maybe it was cus i was a little rusty having not trained for more than a week. worse still, melvin informed me that i was gonna play wing. first thought that flashed across my mind- bryan.

since weeks ago, that's all they cld talk abt. bryan's super fast, bryan's amazing, bryan's in the national 7's squad yada yada kelada. yet again, it was all too hyped up. he made only one run and nvr even threatened to breach our defence.

so it was to my relief that thomas ( our winger ) took him, and i took the blind side. but it was good from the start, i made one run and stuff. it was good lah, generally our forward pack controlled the scc pack who were overwhelmingly much bigger. but our superior fitness shone through. ren han was simply amazing at stand off tdy lah. goodness, his kicking and all. wow.
i had to run alot to chase balls up and down the wing. tiring, i must say. we eventually defeated scc 6-0. courtesy of two penalties by han. it's this moments in rugby that makes all the commitment worthwhile. memories of RI came back to mind. this feeling of.. satisfaction, relief, joy beyond words and what have you. you know, it comes abt when you go into a game, with the tumultous pressure of having to win it. and when you finally DO win it. like wow, it's an extra plus point. and also cus they were our arch rivals. we rose to the challenge. i got an adidas water bottle for being the best newcomer. which was totally amazing, considering the fact that i was with much more sublime players. i am relishing next yr's police cup. (:

this alone wld have made my day anyday.
so this is it, it's time for good study time now.

showered and rushed to town with jon. met up with the rest of zumanijovi* for dinner at seoul garden. but the food was rather average. paid 150 in all for 6 heads. and YIKSHUYING ate VERY little only. glares- but it was super fun, filled with laughter, joy.. zumani-jovi style.



God, thank You so much for making this day incredible and happy for me. ((:

love.

| Washed at at Saturday, September 04, 2004

Friday, September 03, 2004
internet's finally back.

through countless reflections, reminiscing the past, random thoughts abt various issues i thought i'd found all the necessary ingredients for a good blogging session. but unfortunately, it's not to be. it's as if, whatever experiences i had during the past 5 days at Ubin was meant to stay there. my mind feels worryingly numb, like a void. nothingness.

argh.
it feels unbearable already, like i've told mark nigel jon, it's make or break. but which path shd i take? is it an unnecessary risk? is it gonna break me? then again, there's always a risk involved.
haha i can go on dabbling in self debate in this and there wldnt be a conclusion. hence, i wont.

it's one of those moments. where, you feel you're slowly self-destructing from the inside. like a disease, like AIDS. you know it's coming but it's taking an excruciatingly long time to come. who likes death to come slowly? we all want it to be swift, painless.

the greatest kind of failure, is the failure to counter your flaws. the kind of critical flaws that paves the path of one. it seemingly feels like im that kind. it's hanging by a thread, but i will survive.

pm lee's speech was inspiring. i have been indulging in fantasies abt being a pm occasionally since then. ahaha. what the hell. on hindsight, judging by the incredible speed in which this year has passed, it would end very very soon. and the Os are looming on the horizon no more, but rather, waiting on my doorstep. my mly Os are in june, a mere 6 months away, and here i am getting 42. pathetic dn't you think?

scc tmr. my body is still smarting from all the abusive rocks that i slept on the past two nights in Ubin. but it was super fun- the super racist jokes, and the super scary ghost stories. we were scared silly lah. heh heh. hopefully it'll all be good tmr. enough for tonight.

love.

| Washed at at Friday, September 03, 2004

Sunday, July 25, 2004
tdy was simply amazing.

a gathering of kindred spirits was jst fantastic, lah.
john tommy and jason, thank you.
our hard work for months paid off.
i thought our canon was jst great.
lotsa people came down, practically the whole world.
heh.
most importantly
zumani jovi and shu and jan came down.
oh yes and clara mel denise and evelyn too.
i appreciate it. (:

was soo nervous, i tell you.
my hands were sweating buckets and all..
the afternoon performance was a great 'trial' run.
haha.
headed for supper after tht.
bleh. there were like so many people to catch up with.
but it was impossible as everyone were heading for diff places.
shu hadta go home straight away.
but yeah, it's been memorable.
dearest yong looked nothing short of memorising.

sheer was unbelievable on the drums.
cls were great as well.
and the show was tainted with comical moments as well,
with dan fong gg outta cntrl with his voice, hahaha.
tht was funny.
and jon. ah, tht goon doo.
i shall not mention, he wldnt like it.

well two canon performances in a day has been emotionally
as well as physically sapping man.
im dead beat now.

will cntinue tmr or stg.

goodnight.


a bitter remnant of my past?

| Washed at at Sunday, July 25, 2004

Saturday, July 24, 2004

| Washed at at Saturday, July 24, 2004

Wednesday, July 21, 2004
the darkest, smallest space in the vastness of my memory, you belong there.

| Washed at at Wednesday, July 21, 2004